Born to run with Bruce

STATTO: You really need to smarten up.

STU: What's wrong with me?

STATTO: Look at you! Ripped jeans, your shirt isn't ironed and you've got designer stubble! You look like a mechanic!

STU: What's wrong with that? Ever since you rediscovered Mod, you've been really picky about what everyone else is wearing. Look at you there, in your fancy blue suit!

STATTO: What's wrong with it?

STU: Nothing mate, if you're a sailor! Well, for your information, I'm dressing for the type of music I like too?

STATTO: Mike and the Mechanics? Billy Joel in the Uptown Girl video?

STU: Mate, this is the Bruce look!

STATTO: It's been a good game, good game! Nothing in this game for a pair!

STU: Bruce Springsteen! Not Forsyth!

STATTO: What a saga!

STU: You're not funny. I'm paying tribute to a proper legend here son.

STATTO: But that could mean Springsteen or Forsyth!

STU: I'm referring to the rock star. I'm hardly going to dress like Brucie am I?

STATTO: I dunno, a monkey suit can be quite fetching, especially if you complete the look with dickie bow.

STU: If I walked into the pub wearing that, people would think the turn has arrived.

STATTO: As opposed to a grease monkey on his lunch break?

STU: What's wrong with that? Bruce Springsteen is a man of the people. That's why we love him, he's not preaching from above. He was a worker who lived the dream and made it big. He's a proper American idol...

STATTO: And?

STU: And there are a lot of those new bands you bang on about, doffing their cap to him. The Killers, Gaslight Anthem, Jersey Budd and I could go on and on.

STATTO: Ok mate fair point well made.

STU: You don't like him because you don't own any of his albums and don't have any Bruce facts.

STATTO: I do!

STU: Go on then.

STATTO: Bruce fact: He acquired the nickname "The Boss" during his early days as a musician playing pubs and bars with his band. He had to collect the band's wages and dish it out later, hence they called him the boss. However, "The Boss" has never liked this nickname, due to his dislike of er...bosses.

STU: See, man of the people!

STATTO: I think he's alright but I can't see what the fuss is about. It's all a bit too American for me to be honest. I like the theme to Philadelphia and that's only because it makes me think of low fat cheese spread.

STU: You? Low fat? That'll be the day! So you're telling me you didn't like Born to Run, Born in the USA and I'm On Fire? And his recent stuff is brilliant too! Radio Nowhere, The Wrestler…

STATTO: Yeah, all those songs are pretty good.

STU: So what's your problem?

STATTO: He just looks like he needs good a wash, that's all.

STU: Unbelievable. You're so snobby. I bet you don't like other bands for the same reasons don't you?

STATTO: Correct, The Prodigy's hair is too green and shaved badly, AC/DC wear too much denim and Michael Jackson….

STU: Leave it!

STATTO: I was going to say, too much plastic.

STU: Well I think Bruce is a proper legend.

STATTO: I'm not saying he's not, I'm just saying he's not for me.

STU: Born In The USA is one of the those songs that a lot of people miss the point of.

STATTO: You mean thickos?

STU: Mate, you don't have to be thick to not get irony – By the way, I like that blue suit you're wearing, I really wish I had one.

STATTO: Cheers mate!

STU: (Sigh) Then again, maybe you do have to be thick not to get irony.

STATTO: What?

STU: Nothing! Anyway, I was saying, it's one of those songs that people miss the point of.

STATTO: How?

STU: Well, Ronald Reagan, and later Bob Dole, used it in their election campaign's. A room full of septic tanks, punching the air, signing "Born In The USA", thinking it's a positive anthem for America.

STATTO: When actually, it's a song moaning about America!

STU: Exactly.

STATTO: I think the reason Born In The USA has been widely misinterpreted and misused, is that the strident, anthemic chorus overwhelms the verses, which contain the poignant story of a worn-out Vietnam veteran who can't get a break, despite living in the land of opportunity.

STU: Eh??? Where the hell did all that come from!

STATTO: The internet, I was just reading up on Bruce!

STU: Thank god for that, I thought you'd become even more of a ponce!

STATTO: I think you'll find the word is "poncier".

STU: This house rests!

STATTO: I can't win can I?

STU: Not in that suit you can't!

Click here to see 'The Boss' perform Born In The USA, in concert.